The snowstorm guide
Maine has a unique culture. It’s a place where you might wear shorts in the morning and a sweatshirt by dusk. It’s a place where you might get your lobster trap lines cut if you set them down in the wrong place. It’s a place where duct tape can solve just about anything. But nothing is a better indicator of Maine culture than a good ol’ fashioned Nor’easter. In fact, it happens to be snowing as I’m writing this.
If you ever have the fortune (or misfortune, depending on your point of view) to visit Maine during a snowstorm, you might be thrown off a bit about how the storm ranks in the eyes of true Mainahs. To aid you in this hypothetical unlikely situation, I’ve prepared a guide of three tests I use to gauge the severity of a Maine snowstorm.
The Stocking Up Test
The day before the storm, head down to the local gathering place (grocery store/”mahket”, convenience store/”cahnah stah”, transfer station/”dump”) and just listen to some of the locals talk about the storm. If a large portion of the people you see are either gathering water, shovels, and an unreasonable amount of reading materials or talking about the storm (”I’m glad I came back from so-and-so last night”, “stocking up just in case”, “hope the snowblower still works”), chances are it’ll be a big one. In fact, having these community conversations sometimes seems equivalent to doing a rain dance.
The Plow Test
As the storm winds down, look out onto a main road and tally the first ten cars you see. If two of ten are a truck with a plow on the front, it was a pretty good storm. If seven or more have one, you’ve just experienced something almost historical. Bonus points if the majority of the vehicles are municipal or state plow trucks. The only exception to this test is the case where no cars are driving because there’s five feet of snow covering the road and/or all the cars. At that point, though, do you really need to ask about the severity of the storm?
The “Remember That Storm” Test
After the snow has fallen, head back to the gathering place you selected for the Stocking Up Test. If a majority of the people talking there compare the storm to a past one (”almost as bad as the storm in ‘98″ or “eh, the storm in ‘92 was worse”), you’ve just experienced a good storm. Double your points if the person talking is over 50 years old and compares the storm to one before 1965.
I hope this guide was useful to you in the event of a Maine storm visit. If you ever do come on up to see the snow, remember your Bean boots, your hat and mittens, and your duct tape – just in case.
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